Another day living at Sunward

JP Woodcock here
Living in #17

Kris, oh I am ever so terribly sorry about mistakenly identifying just
which one of your friends spent the night at #16 the other day. I
really should have taken that class in the common house, last summer,
about hillbilly identification. It would have helped me sort things
out in this time of unreality and uncertainty.

How do you tell hillbillies apart Kris, oh I mean Eva (her new name)(I
guess she didn't like her old name after she turned 47)(I guess she
needed a new start)(how do you get a fresh start?)(I just keep having
the same old problems over and over)?

I digress, excuse me, let's get back to the trespassers, excuse me
again, the new potential "might be" hope not owners of #16. Do
hillbillies have identification tags or glow in the dark emblems of
their clans hanging on a steel chain around their necks to keep them
straight? I mean there are now three hillbillies moving in and out of
#16 at will and passing each other in the night that I am now
bewildered trying to track which one is which. Their movements bring
to mind an old time movie where the actors push each other around like
the lying, cheating crooks that they are.

If I wasn't so frightened by these hillbilly friends of yours Eva, I
might find them intriguing. Let's see, I would like to own a house
for almost nothing. Yes I do like that. Let's see I need to take
some classes to learn how to effectively be a backstabbing, scheming,
scamming, denier of reality and truth. This shouldn't be too hard for
your friends Eva, because they were born for this role and they have
been waiting all of their life to show the world just how stupid they
are. No, I do not like this at all.

Again, let's see, back to identifying which hillbilly was at your
house the other night. I would like to be kept in the loop on which
one of your no-good friends will be visiting #16 or sleeping at #16 on
any given day. I need to know if a visitation is a level two
hillbilly who is just helping out or a Level One hillbilly threat who
is the real deal threat but who is really intolerable to me and a
rather slimy nightmare of a man. Also, there is another level one
hillbilly female who is hillbilly #1's the always smiling, for some
unknown reason, girlfriend or business partner or maybe both and she
might be the scariest of all the hillbilly consortium.

Anyways, I need help in the proper identification of these players so
I can inform the neighborhood on whether we should be on a level two
orange Hillbilly Alert, with a modest threat level or a full blown red
hot level one Hillbilly Alert with the lawyers and the banks and the
courts bringing grief on the
Hillbilly Logic and then bringing your friends down to cold hard
reality and possibly sending them to jail or stepping on their ears or
maybe both. While it is always a pleasure to watch other people make
a train wreck of their lives this level red is very toxic and it makes
me sick in the head.

While this letter has been a nice opening up of me to you Kris or Eva
or maybe you've changed your name again (Have you?) I still feel we
need to identify these Hillbilly folk and make sure I do know how to
greet them. Let me see, Well Mr. Sick in the Head how is your day
going? Mine has been a bit messed up because you were dropped into my
world by a less than brightly intelligent neighbor (Eva or Kris or
whatever) who decided to stick it to the man by poking her neighbors
in the eye.

Or maybe it's the "Something for Nothing" Hillbillies who have the
vision to think they could own a home by cleaning the place up a
little and after the requisite number of hours in court lying through
their teeth with assumed names and then because they left an old pair
of shoes at #16 they can now declare ownership of the place. How do
you greet these individuals? I am lost for words.

Question: Because the hillbillies used aliases in court, instead of
their real names, does this mean that there are now five hillbillies
to identify. God this is getting more disturbing by the minute. I'll
have to set up a hillbilly-spread sheet to connect the lies with the
faces.

Have I left anything out Kris? I would really like to be
understanding of this mess you and your disgusting friends are causing
at #16 but I guess I simply have not evolved enough in this life to
accept your illusionary, delusionary and criminal notions of how to BE
in this world.

I hope you enjoy your new life in your new country with your new name
while I and the neighborhood sift through the debris of your bad
intentions or maybe you think they are good intentions but whatever
they have gone to bad intentions quickly and are a reflection of your
former and possibly present incarnation of bad choices and, like my
parent's used to say, "the influence of your lousy friends."

Peace out to you my former neighbor and now a Canadian. Oh I might
suggest you stay up north for a long time until the smoke left here by
your lousy friends blows over.


JP Woodcock out.